Idol Lover

I have a confession to make: I secretly enjoy watching American Idol

I enjoy the first round train-wreck auditions the most. Before you think I'm a terrible person for saying that, let me say this: I've been that train wreck auditionee -- not for American Idol itself per se. Let's just say I've been through my share of pretty painful acting and singing auditions.

Remembering one in particular still makes me cringe. I was trying to sing something from a certain Sondheim musical, and I bombed. It was unspeakably bad. The director's cartoonish expression of horror caused his pointy brows to jump for the relative safety of his scalp - that was the only explanation I could conjure to explain the way they seemed to leap clear off his forehead. Those frantic eyebrows still haunt me sometimes when I'm singing alone in the car or around the house!

Some dreams die hard. Mine should have been bludgeoned mercilessly with a club. Those who ever so gently suggested that maybe I should try something else deserve a medal for their tactfulness. At the time I was pretty bummed out about it, but time and age have a wonderful way of straightening out your perspective on things. Now I wonder what on earth was I thinking? I may be able to carry a tune, but I ain't no vocal diva!

So it is with a mixture of amusement and embarassment that I tune in and watch other would-bes give it their best shot. You hope for the best, but then there are some who, like me, are really much better off getting shot down now. It's kind of like a public service, eh? ;)

UPDATE: Jeff at Proverbs Daily provides the proverbial take on how flattery will get you absolutely nowhere (or worse!)